Lewis County Herald - Serving Hohenwald, Lewis County Tennessee Since 1898

Tyrades! Can You Guess Santa's Biggest Regrets?

Series: Tyrades | Story 23

December 10, 2020

We all know Santa Claus as a “right jolly old elf,” but the man carries a well-stocked bag of regrets.

He recently sat down with me to list some of the ways he wished his life had gone differently.

“I don’t regret the Island of Misfit Toys real estate venture per se, but I sort of hate that we used an old atomic testing site. I’m cool with a water pistol shooting jelly – but not RADIOACTIVE jelly.”

“I wish I had found a better business manager to protect my trademark. My FRIENDS have good business managers. You never hear of anybody playing Secret Tooth Fairy or Dirty Easter...

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