Lewis County Herald - Serving Hohenwald, Lewis County Tennessee Since 1898

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Tyrades! Is A Platonic Life Partnership Right for You?

Fact: families take many forms. Grandparents rear grandchildren. Never-married siblings share the ancestral homeplace until death. High school sweethearts get married in a fever but gradually drift apart. BFFs move in together for emotional/financial...

 

Tyrades! How'd you like one across the lip?

A YouTube video magically transported me back to what I was watching on Thursday, January 13, 1972. The clip from NBC’s red-hot “Flip Wilson Show” features Flip as a standup comedian being heckled unmercifully by guest Redd Foxx. At the end of...

 

Tyrades! Does Baby New Year give you the creeps?

Perhaps one reason I never get invited to New Year’s Eve parties is that I tend to overanalyze things. Take Baby New Year (a.k.a. “Bundle of White Male Joy”), for instance. Society’s reliance on this iconic tyke in editorial cartoons,...

 

Tyrades! Are You Ready for the War of the Weddings?

Folks are tied up in knots over tying the knot. Just when we thought marriage was a dying institution, the Wall Street Journal cites statistics showing there is a huge pent-up demand for weddings. Because of COVID-19 restrictions, the backlog of...

 

Tyrades!

My access to news narrowed dramatically when I was 10 years old. My mother’s boss passed away, so I no longer got to peruse his morning paper. And, despite my protestations about prying the funnies from my cold, ink-stained fingers, family budget...

 

Tyrades! Has Christmas Eve Become Groundhog Day, John-Boy?

This may get me on Santa’s naughty list, but I honestly can’t remember whether I watched “The Homecoming: A Christmas Story” when CBS first aired it on December 19, 1971. Since my mother is an antique collector and regales everyone with...

 

Tyrades! How Will You Mark the 400th Anniversary of Thanksgiving?

Last year the media went into a frenzy over the 400th anniversary of the Mayflower’s arrival in North America, but the festivities were just beginning. This Thanksgiving marks four centuries since the 1621 harvest festival held by the half of the...

 

Tyrades! Should Churches Have a Dress Code?

Where do you reside on the “holier than thou” versus “holeyer than thou” spectrum? I make only passing reference to squabbles over “proper” church attire in my 2020 motivational book “Yes, Your Butt Still Belongs in Church” (still...

 

Tyrades! Are Veterans the Heroes Who Keep On Giving?

I’m not complaining, but after 23 years of column writing, it becomes increasingly challenging to find new angles for recurring events such as Mother’s Day or Memorial Day. So, when it came time to write about Veterans Day (again), I sought inspi...

 

Tyrades! Is Halloween 2021 Cursed?

Someday we will all laugh about Halloween 2021. We may be laughing maniacally in padded cells, but we will laugh. I’m sure there’s no need to tell you this (unless you’re living under newspapers instead of reading them); but celebrants this...

 

Tyrades! Have You Hugged A Bureaucrat Lately?

As a longtime fan of Monty Python’s “Ministry of Silly Walks” sketch, I feel compelled to say a few words on behalf of much-maligned bureaucrats everywhere. Consider the adjectives that get recycled ad nauseum when bureaucrats are mentioned:...

 

Tyrades! Where Do You Stand on The Leaf-Raking Issue?

If you don’t like my opinions this week, you can take a flying leap…into a pile of festive autumn leaves. (Skip the wet sucker – per Linus van Pelt.) In this great melting pot of a nation, people have many ways of handling leaves. They rake the...

 

Tyrades! Is Your Safety Plan Up to Date?

One of my many duties at my “day job” is serving as point man for our workplace safety program. Since I have a hair-trigger for gabbing about bloodborne pathogens, bodily fluids, corrosives, and other appetizing subjects, we no longer have a...

 

Tyrades! Can You Handle Tomorrow's Automotive Dealerships?

According to recent media reports, investors are leaving skid marks as they steer away from the century-old model of selling automobiles. Mom-and-pop dealerships, cagey price negotiations and eye-popping inventories will be left in the rearview...

 

Tyrades! Are You Bathing Too Frequently?

When I worked at my late uncle’s junkyard during junior high school, one of the regular customers (a crusty coot who resembled a cantankerous Roy Rogers sidekick wannabe) assured us that he luxuriated in a steaming bathtub each and every night. We...

 

Blue or Green

The donkey told the tiger, “The grass is blue.” The tiger replied, “No, the grass is green .” The discussion became heated, and the two decided to submit the issue to arbitration, so they approached the lion. As they approached the lion on...

 

Tyrades! Do You Remember the Rural Purge of '71?

In mid-1971, I experienced a most distressing visit to the dentist. A TV fan magazine in the waiting room divulged life-changing news. Irene Ryan (who portrayed Granny on “The Beverly Hillbillies”) told an interviewer she was madder than a wet...

 

Tyrades! What Do You Remember About 9/11 - And Before?

Early on the morning of September 11, 2001, I was a newly minted warehouse supervisor for a farmers cooperative. I can remember almost exactly where a customer’s truck was parked when I overheard him telling one of my co-workers something or...

 

Tyrades! Have you thanked a school bus driver lately?

According to the Wall Street Journal, the fledgling online gambling industry is poised to explode in popularity. This season, the NFL for the first time is permitting sports-gambling companies to advertise during games. I don’t envy the precarious... Full story

 

Tyrades! Have you thanked a school bus driver lately?

According to CNN, pandemic fears and enhanced unemployment benefits have left the nation facing a serious shortage of qualified school bus drivers. The problem is acute -- despite districts implementing recruitment campaigns, offering sign-up...

 

Tyrades! Did someone say, "tax holiday"?

The Tyree family recently took advantage of our state’s eagerly anticipated annual sales tax holiday on school supplies, clothing and electronics. Eagerly anticipated as in my wife taking the Charlton Heston role of promoting delayed gratification...

 

Tyrades! Do morning people deserve to live?

A 1986 Pantene commercial carried the tagline “Don’t Hate Me Because I’m Beautiful.” Similarly, I must ask my readers, “Don’t hate me because I’ve heard a rooster crow.” I tend to get up at the crack of dawn, even though I eventually...

 

Tyrades! Have you visited a presidential home lately?

While in Santa Claus, Indiana to cool off at Holiday World, the Tyree family took a side trip to tour the Lincoln Boyhood National Memorial in nearby Lincoln City. “But I thought Abraham Lincoln was from Kentucky!” a co-worker objected. True,...

 

Tyrades! Family portraits: do you love them or dread them?

My family took the easy way out -- again. We had our annual chance at a professional portrait and decided to let (insist) son Gideon pose solo for the umpteenth time. Oh, we’ve had three-person portraits before and every once in a great while, I...

 

Tyrades! Have you been avoiding the dentist?

Life is returning to normal; but where dental health is concerned, normal may not be good enough. According to a report from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, even BEFORE the pandemic, one-third of American adults under 65...

 

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